Traveling Light

All of us have every day life lessons we hold dear from our parents. Many of us pay our bills, do our laundry or cook in the same methods our parents taught us, at least by example. I fold towels and make beds using the same technique as my mother. I wipe counters down in the same sweeping gestures, using a paper towel to catch the crumbs, the way my dad did. I have a filing method identical to theirs, though I have to admit that I'm not as meticulous in my administration skills. I answer the phone with the same cadence in my voice, and often use the same word choices they might have used. I have comparable sets of strengths and weaknesses. And yet, when it comes to packing a suitcase, I couldn't be 'less' their child. My mother and father had packing lightly down to a science. My father, never the most patient man when traveling and never one to waste time in any area of his life, insisted that they each bring one carry on bag to any destination. He was convinced that on no trip would anyone every need more than he could carry on a flight. Although Dad has since passed away, Mom continues in this admirable and simple packing method. I have never seen my mother look out of place, lacking in some way or otherwise unprepared on a journey. So, where did I go wrong?


I seem to have missed out on both the nature and nurture of this critical skill. However, my husband, though not a blood relation to my parents, seems to have inherited the trait. He teases me about the amount I will pack for one night away. I believe I have packed more for an overnight than he has packed for a week. Will he be less prepared than I am? Will he be missing a critical pair of shoes during his time away? It has yet to happen. I can fill a steamer trunk for a weekend away, and still not have exactly what I need, when I need it. I own one of the largest suitcases made, and have to be extremely careful as I pack it now, because of the new weight restrictions. I can easily stuff my Brontosaurus on wheels with shoes, skirts, sweaters, jewelry, back up shirts in case of spills (likely in my case) and outerwear to the point of bursting. I travel with a veritable pharmacy of allergy medicine, skin cream and Advil, never knowing what I will need when I need it. Knowing that I bring everything but the kitchen sink (though I admit I did pack the Quesadilla maker for a ski trip), I would be exceptionally well prepared for any eventuality. So, why is it that I have a suitcase full of everything, but nothing that works on my trips?


I have traveled to Arizona with the Winnebago bag filled to the point of worrying about the zipper busting open. On arrival, and for the remainder of my trip, I have worn clothes out of my mother's closet. I have gone to California to visit my cousin, confident that I would be right at home, and have needed her to run me to Macy's upon arrival. I have learned, by process of "What doesn't work" that I know exactly what I need to bring on a trip, and seem to gravitate towards packing the exact opposite. And yet, I'm working on my "travel survival without errors" artistry. My daughter, who has inherited the adroit equipment attribute, is teaching me. As I prepare for an upcoming week away, she is helping me put multiple, appropriate outfits together, using a minimal number of pieces. I'm learning that 'more' doesn't mean 'right', and that a suitcase filled with single wear pieces isn't helpful. I'm discovering that just because I own 28 pairs of shoes does mean that all 56 must travel with me like children. It's still very difficult for me to narrow down, make multi-tasking choices and be brutal in my assessment of needs. But, I'm trying to make a valiant effort to streamline this process to allow me to bring just one carry on bag. The reward at the end? No long wait at Carousel B, no missing luggage reports to fill out, and no more bruised shins from slamming the suitcase version of King Kong into my legs.


As I prepare for both my upcoming trip, as well as this blog piece, I realize how much of life is easier if we travel lightly. The more metaphorical baggage we insist on carrying along with us, the more weighed down we will be. As we tote our emotional loads, we become overwhelmed, exhausted and unprepared for the reality of our day's adventures, because we're so bogged down in the past. It's very difficult to let go of this baggage. For many of us, the burdens we bear are at the very heart of who we are. The pain in our lives, for good or bad, has shaped us into the people we are today. And yet, by continuing to drag that heavy, imaginary Samsonite case everywhere we go, we miss out on the chance to create new memories, experience different things and be open to new possibilities. We're so filled with the past, there is no room for the future.

My best advice is to find ways to let your heaviness of heart dissipate. Using meditation, prayer, exercise, journaling or just casting your cares on the wind, you can release them with full knowledge that you don't need carry them any longer. You can talk to friends, write articles or hike those troubles out. They're only weighing you down. They do not help you on your journey. They just take up space. Much like a suitcase filled with inappropriate clothing, a heart and mind packed with frustration, sorrow and bitterness will only make you feel worse about the way you travel through life.


As I attempt my vacation with just one carry on, I look ahead with a lightness in my heart and a spring in my step. Will I miss something? Probably. Will it be the end of the world? Absolutely not. I will learn to adjust and make do...and hopefully have a much easier time along the way.

Down by the riverside, I laid my burdens down, Now I'm traveling light, My spirit lifted high,I found my freedom now And I'm traveling light.... Billie Holliday