Passion

Chase down your passion like it's the last bus of the night. ~Glade Byron Addams

One of my greatest frustrations about Valentine's Day is how dreadful the holiday makes people who aren't deeply in love feel about themselves. The not-terribly subtle message is "You have to have a partner with whom to share this day of passion or you are left out of the club". I find that both offensive and condescending. It's a wonderful and beautiful experience to be in love, particularly in those heady days of early romance. One's heart beats faster at the mere thought of the object of one's affection. Pondering all the daydreams, the "What if's?" and the meanderings of an idyllic fairy tale can be even more magical than the romance itself. When one isn't in love, it's difficult to envision passion on a grand scale. Additionally, when one has been in a relationship for many years, the day to day practicality of bills, schedules, parenting, chores and jobs can overshadow the illusionary enchantment.

It's my firm belief that passion should have far less to do with wooing the object of one's desire. In my own mind and heart, it should be the wooing of our own deepest dreams for our own lives. Living a life of passion doesn't have to either involve, or negate, another human being. Rather, it means kindling the fires the lie within each of us to lead a life filled with purpose and confidence. A passionate life doesn't need to signal an immoral one. It can mean an existence in which one seeks out her dreams, discovers her hidden talents, and loses herself in the present moment. A passionate life can mean not allowing opportunities to fall by the wayside, but embracing each chance to learn something new. Achieving this can also mean asking yourself "What do I love?", "What makes me the happiest?" and "What can I do to feel jazzed about being alive?".

Far too much time is spent worrying about our failures. I am terribly guilty of this issue. I have allowed my anxiety over disappointing others, as well as myself, keep me from experiences, goals and seeking out my heart's desire. I have felt that, as long as I've secretly nurturing and daydreamed about my future, I would never be disillusioned. I was afraid that if I should try and then fail, I would have nothing left to look forward to. But, what's happened is that I've squandered my time...I've allowed decades to slip away from me because I was too nervous that I'd be rejected. Therefore, I want to commit myself to living more passionately. I want to submit more articles to magazines, to keep working on my book, and to expand upon pieces I've already finished. It's terrifying. But, unless I proceed with courage and confidence, I will never achieve my goals. I will only wonder what might have been in my life.

Passion can also apply to how we take on obstacles that lie in our path. We can decide to retreat and go back into our shells of complacency. Or, we can venture forward with William Wordsworth's "Might Yawp" and passionately defeat those troubles that create the blockages in our lives. We can choose to work around people who are naysayers. We can decide to face our fears. We can adopt a resilience that will enable us to keep moving forward...with passion and determination.

If you received candy and flowers from the love of your life, be appreciative but look for your inner ecstasy too. If not, fear not! A passionate life depends far more on how we meet life head on, than how others make us feel.