Powerless

We had an intense blizzard yesterday. What began as a slow and gradual accumulation of snow overnight turned into full blown (pun fully intended) white out conditions for 24 hours. While my 16 year old was thrilled with having a Snow Day (and therefore, postponing return to school, after February break, by another day), my husband and I were doing out best to keep life running smoothly, without power. We are fortunate: when my parents built this house, my visionary father had the foresight to install a generator. While the generator is a godsend (or in my case, a Dad-send), it only runs the bare essentials: heat, a few key lights and the fridge.

Although we were safe and our pantry could easily feed an Army of Huns for weeks, it was very easy to feel powerless, both literally and metaphorically. We had absolutely no control when power would be restored. We had no idea when cable and internet would come back. We found our landline phone service was sketchy at best, and there is no cell service at our house. We were, quite simply, at the mercy of Mother Nature, AT & T and Central Maine Power, not to mention, the Town of Camden's road service.

Considering the fact that I do tend to micromanage just about everything I can lay my hands on, I found myself getting very frustrated when I couldn't use my appliances, and had to light lanterns around the house. I felt powerless in the literal sense. I have such a habit of everything electronic working, I found myself walking into rooms, and switching on lights. It took me a few moments each time to grasp that *they didn't work*. The same thing happened with the stove. I tried to preheat the oven for 5 minutes before I realized that it didn't work. Thankfully, I have burners that are propane based, so I was able to light them (without burning myself) and cook up some tins of food. It wasn't a gourmet meal, but we made due. However, all I could think of was how much better dinner would have been with the oven working. Although Jeff and Joshua were perfectly content with hot dogs and beans, I felt enormous guilt that I couldn't whip up something magnificent, in a "MacGuyver meets Martha Stewart" sort of way. I felt impotent in my cooking abilities!

And yet, being powerless wasn't dreadful in the long run. Being unplugged meant I spent more time with the dogs outside, and laughing with family indoors. I was not surgically connected to the computer, the phone or chores requiring electricity. Freed from the responsibilities that come with power, I was able to ignore the floor that needed vacuuming, the laundry that needed washing and the emails I had to send. I was able to live completely in the moment, and to enjoy the blessing of a day 'off'...not just from work, but from outside distractions, as well. I was able to take the time to notice the unbelievable beauty of the Maine coast after a snow storm, and realize how truly blessed I was to live in a place that looks like children imagine Santa's home to be. I was able to devour visually the fluffy white snow against the sharp green of the evergreens, and the vivid blueness of the icicles.

While I have to admit that I was very happy when the power came back on 36 hours later, I must also say that I learned a great deal about appreciation of the peace and quiet. I just wish peace and quiet came with a Cafe au Lait.

I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it. ~ Alice Walker, "The Color Purple"