The Simple Things...

'"Tis the gift to be simple,'tis the gift to be free,'tis the gift to come down where you ought to be,And when we find ourselves in the place just right, It will be in the valley of love and delight." ~ Elder Joseph Brackett, jr., "Shaker Hymn"


The first lines of the hymn quoted just above are among my favorite, not just among songs sung in worship, but of inspirational poetry, as well. Written in 1848, this hymn is relatively new in the grand scheme of Christian worship songs. The Shakers were considered radical, even by their founding denomination, the Quakers. Therefore, it's all the more extraordinary that this beautiful song not only made its way into most Protestant hymnals of all denominations, but became a popular melody for other pieces, including Aaron Copeland's "Appalachian Piece". The simple, inspiring, deeply moving beauty of this song has brought it lasting fame. Additionally, the additional lyrics, which speak of friendship, understanding, compassion and utterly unadulterated joy, resonate with mainstream society today, as much as they must have in the Shaker community in Alfred, Maine, in the mid-19th century.


One of the most common conversations I have with both my yoga students, and my friends, recently, has been a longing for a return to the simple things in life. Although very few want to renounce all their wordly possessions and join ashrams or monasteries, all yearn for a time of uncomplicated lives. Some dream of the carefree days of childhood in which there was nothing more pressing than riding bikes or catching fireflies. Others are beginning to find that technology, designed to make life easier, has actually increased stress and demands on their time. The sad fact is that life has become increasingly demanding, difficult and drama-filled. We spend our days running from place to place, we live in fear of losing our jobs and our homes. We read books about decluttering our homes, and yet, we think we need more to fill the void. We worry about our children's exposure to the ugliness of life, long after they have been desensitized through years of television and movies. We find ourselves running on a hamster wheel every day, never getting ahead and always feeling as we need to stay on that wheel...or something dreadful will happen. It becomes a never ending cycle.


The sad truth is that we are our own hamster wheel. We wake up every morning, and we climb onto that circle and we begin to run...and run. We make that choice of our own volition. While we can blame society all we like, we choose to check email ten times a day and we choose to create drama in our lives, where there needn't be any. There are stresses we simply can't avoid. We have to work to pay our bills, provide for our families and put food on the table. But, we can choose to release those areas in our lives that simply aren't working for us with any benefit. We can decide to walk away from unchangeable, unmanageable situations. We can say "no" when we want to. I have a wonderful friend who had a great deal of trouble not agreeing to volunteer for every job she was asked to do. She became very close to burn out in all areas of her life from spreading herself far too thinly. So, she came up with a response that would keep her from feeling rude, and yet, would get her off the hook. When asked "Will you run this program this year?", she smiled kindly and said, "No, but thank you very much for thinking of me."


"No, but thank you very much for thinking of me" has become one of my mantras. I, too, have been a 'helpaholic'. When asked to step in and assist, I generally do agree. Why? Because I do believe in service to my community. The question is knowing how to pick and choose, and when to say "When". Simplifying our lives does not mean relinquishing all of our commitments. Some of them are critically important. Where would the world be if everyone said "No!" and stayed home? The trick is finding that all important balance of what we can do to benefit others, our families, ourselves and our communities, without risking our own well being in doing so. There is not a magic formula for this balance. Some people have a higher tolerance for multi-tasking than others. But, for everyone, taking the time to pause, to truly consider all the possibilities before agreeing to a job (or saying "No, thank you") can give you the much needed moments to discover if the position is viable. All too often, we are pressured into making an impulsive decision on the stop. After years of agreeing immediately, I've discovered that, in 24 hours, or even in 12 hours, my choices are more sound and I have fewer regrets in either direction of a decision.

Simplicity is not as easy to achieve as it can feel when we're yearning for it. The truth is that we like our computers, we like our stylish clothes and well running cars and we like our modern amenities. Even those of us who set simplicity as a goal find ourselves pulled towards 'keeping up with the Joneses'. For many people, myself included, this is far less to do with envy, and far more to do with admiration. We see something we like, from a convenient kitchen appliance to photos from a restful, but beautiful, trip, and we think "Wow! That looks amazing! I want that too!". We come to realize that in making our lives simple, we still create more work. Making our peace with the idea that simplicity doesn't always equal ease is a crucial concept. In Yoga, one of most basic asanas is also one of the most challenging. Staff Pose involves sitting upright, with flexed feet and long legs in front of your body, and a straight back. The yogini's head is pulled in alignment with her spine, and her goal is to create a perfect L with her body. As basic as this may appear, it actually involves an enormous amount of concentration and core strength. Our first impulse is to slump forward. Then, we want to bend our legs and our head will naturally weigh our neck off balance. Even in this seemingly uncomplicated pose, we find we must work very hard to achieve our goal of balance.


Simplicity can mean a variety of things to a variety of people. It might mean letting go of areas in our lives that are doing more harm than good. It could mean changing our behaviors to find joy in smaller achievements, rather than enormous ones. It could be as genuine as "just saying no". It might mean reevaluating our priorities. Or, it might be a question of releasing negative emotions. Does it mean we must relinquish our lives as we know them? Of course not. But, it might take some clearness of thought to illuminate ways to help ourselves become happier. The goal of the Shakers wasn't to deprive themselves and to be miserable. It was to eliminate distractions so that they could more clearly see the Light. I hope that, in your own quest to simplify, your path will be gently illuminated, as well.

Somewhere over the rainbow....

Somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds fly. Birds fly over the rainbow...why, oh, why can't I?

It has never been a secret that "Somewhere over the rainbow" is one of my favorite songs. Since I was a little girl, curled up on the sofa, watching Dorothy sing in "The Wizard of Oz", as she daydreamed about a place where wishes can come true. Dorothy's impression of that place "over the rainbow" for most of us would be paradise: a place in which she could feel safe from harm, peaceful in heart, loved and protected. Her imaginings led her to believe that that her excursion to "being over the rainbow", would mean that all her troubles would disappear, and where she would be happy forever. Despite the hopeful lyrics of a song that still touches my soul, the irony about Dorothy's fairy tale land was that it didn't exist at all. Yes, Dorothy did fly over the rainbow. She did land in a place completely away from all of her troubles. But, with her voyage came her old nemesis, her old fears and a deep seated homesickness. Dorothy got her wish: she flew over the rainbow. But, in the end, it wasn't the land in which her dreams came true in the way she'd imagined.

How many times have we thought to ourselves, "If I just can have this, I'll be happy for the rest of my life?". For some, that dream of "being over the rainbow" might be the perfect job, a date with your dreamy coworker, a bigger house or a newer car. I have a friend who, for years, cut all the things she wanted out of magazines and newspapers. She pasted these pictures in a scrapbook. She'd gaze at the photos of the elegant colonial style mansion, and the luxury SUV longingly. She would "furnish" her imaginary home with designer rooms from "Elegant Homes" magazine. She would glue photos of hairstyles she liked, and celebrities whose appearance she admired. She would clip out designer outfits from "Vogue" and imagine owning a handbag that cost more than her monthly house payment. My friend called this scrapbook her 'wish book', in an homage to the old Sears catalog that used to come out at Christmas time. Her idea was that she would 'check off' each item as she acquired it. The thing is, as the months turned into years, and the years dragged on, my friend became more and more resentful that she was not checking off more items in her wish book. Her marriage suffered. Her self-esteem crumbled. The wish book became, itself, an insurmountable goal. Because she had chosen to make these unattainable items, that she couldn't be happy without, her perfectly lovely life became the wrong side of the fence. Her wish book, like Dorothy's Oz, became a place that wasn't right for her. It wasn't healthy. And, it wasn't home.

Is it wrong of us to have daydreams, then? I don't believe there is anything wrong with daydreaming. I feel that daydreams are an essential part of creativity. Without daydreams and imagination, there would be no artists, no writers, no scientists making new discoveries. Without engaging in the 'possibilities' part of our brains, we would be deprived of essential thinking skills: lateral thinking and problem solving comes from the same area in the brain that dreams (both waking and sleeping) originate from. We would be unable to solve dilemmas we had never faced before. We would not be able to appreciate traveling to new places or enjoying new experiences, since they would be out of the realm of every day experience. Creative thought is extremely helpful to our society as a whole. It's the greatest daydreamers who have given us some of the greatest accomplishments. Hippocrates, Sir Isaac Newton, Albert Einstein, Benjamin Franklin, Isadora Duncan, Charles Dickens, Vincent Van Gogh and Susan B. Anthony were just some the world's greatest daydreamers....and each one of them made an indelible impression for generations after their lifetimes.

But, what about the rest of us? Since I'm neither a great artist, nor a gifted scientist, does daydreaming have any merit for me...an average woman? Absolutely...having a daydream can give hope to us during difficult times.Daydreams, if we can keep them in check, can be a healthy way to relieve stress. In Yoga, we often use a technique called "Guided Meditation". Also called "Guided Imagery", this is defined as "practice in which your imagination is lead on a particular journey with the purpose of achieving healing and realizations through purposeful contemplation and reflection." For many of us, even during yoga classes, it can be difficult to let go of our working mind. One Yogic school of thought calls this the human "monkey mind", always jumping from tree to tree, never focusing on where one is, but always on what's next to do. A guided imagery meditation might involve gentle music, and a teacher to help lead your thought pattern into a predictable, peaceful and nurturing space. Using our imaginations, we can close our eyes and transform a simple yoga studio into a lush tropical oasis, a breathtaking mountaintop, an illuminated night sky or, simply, the place that most says "comfort" to us. I've had many students tell me that, when I ask them to bring forth the image of the place in which they feel the safest, their grandmother's house is first on the list. Evoking the image of a special place, either real or imaginary, can help restore a panicked breath pattern to normalcy and can aid us in our quest to calm our anxieties. Guided meditation may help relieve suffering for cancer patients, women in labor, those suffering from insomnia and mild depression, as well as those who just need a method to leave 'work' at the office.

When I think about flying over the rainbow, I can't help but smile. Imagining a place in which all my dreams come true is a wonderful image. But, the fact is, we still have daily life to deal with. We still need to live in this world, as it right now, at this very moment. We still need to make practical plans for our future, appreciate the blessings we do have and solve the problems that come our way. Daydreaming about being over the rainbow can be fun and relaxing, but if it begins to interfere with one's daily life, that's when we need to establish a firm grasp on what we're evading. Do we really hate our jobs? Are our children driving us batty? Do we have too little money, and too many bills? These are real issues facing most of us. Daydreaming isn't going to solve our issues. As a matter of fact, if we daydream too much, we may find our problems to seem even more insurmountable...just as Dorothy did, when she felt she had to run away from home to keep Toto safe. By working on creative problem solving techniques to work through these issues, as best as humanly possible, our stress level may also go down. Talking about methods to combat my dilemmas with my friends has been incredibly beneficial to me. In my life, my girlfriends often 'see' answers where I am missing them.

The simple fact is, daydreaming is healthy, beautiful and wonderful. It's part of the human experience. Yet, when it comes right down to it, 'there's no place home'...even if home means a busted water heater and an unstable economy. Home can still be two things at once: our sanctuary from harm and a place that holds mountains of laundry to be washed. If we can reconcile these two places within ourselves, we can live fully in reality, but with a creative imagination.

Namaste.

(And for further inspiration, click on the TITLE..."Somewhere over the Rainbow" at the top of this post, to listen to a beautiful rendition of the song...)